In the past I’ve said that I wouldn’t cover Scientology for various reasons, the least of which is the possibility of legal threats. There are already sites that cover the whole strange cult behavior and mysterious occurrences surrounding Scientology. Then there are the sites that cover stuff like Tom Cruise jumping up and down on Oprah’s couch and throwing his feces around like some chimpanzee on meth. Lame. But when I got wind of this tasty treat, I simply couldn’t resist. This is something so genius, so simple, yet absolutely hilarious.
Les Freres Corbusier presents this bizarre pageant and describes it best:
A cast of grade school children portrays Tom Cruise, the intergalactic ruler Xenu, and a dancing brain, among others, as they bring to life the controversial Church of Scientology in uplifting pageantry and song.
Hmmmm, pageantry and song you say? Since most of us will never have a chance to see this extravaganza, I offer you the next best thing. Here are a couple songs from the soundtrack to give you a little taste of the insanity :) Remember these are kids performing!
L Ron Hubbard – Exactly what does the ‘L’ stand for? Listen and learn.
The Way That It Began – The true story of our beginnings.
Thanks to WFMU for the audio!
No related posts.
I’m normally not a big fan of musicals, but this is brilliant!
I might even drive down to LA, just to see this.
High-larious.
It is like the next best thing since Jesus Christ Superstar.
It’s playing in New York this year. It’s last run was in L.A.
I do hope they will have a DVD or something.
I Are Says: It is like the next best thing since Jesus Christ Superstar.
Screw that, this is the best thing since Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter.
I find myself thinking once more, this is to funny to be true, but then again….
I NEED to see this, this might well be the best comedy in the history of history itself :)
still, i like southpark’s interpretation better.
For those who haven’t seen it (unlikely) *crap, just realised it’s pretty unscrupulous to link to a torrent*
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trapped_in_the_Closet_(South_Park)
http://www.southparkstuff.com/season_9/episode_912/epi912script/
on a side note, scientology’s story is just as bad as that of battlefield earth
Thank Xenu these kids set me straight!
what’s wrong with linking to a torrent?
The L stands for “teach us how to cope”… I’m confused
It funny because it’s tragic and revealing. I may be laughing, but I’m crying on the inside. Oh no wait, that’s laughter too.
Hahahaha! He needed a great name —-RON?!?!? Ha!
for those who really want to know, It stands for
Lafayette Ronald Hubbard.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/L._Ron_Hubbard
Thanks for ruining it Alcari! I’ll have to change Wikipedia to reflect the proper meaning :)
gasmonso
Alcari:
OH MY FUCKIN ANUS! Battlefield Earth had to be the shittiest movie I have ever seen. We were stranded in a place that only had one movie theatre, and was playing only BFE, and the Gladiator.
I “convinced” my friends to waste our only time to see a movie, and that BFE was the logical choice cause it was a SCI-FI thriller. We ended up walking out half-way through; I vito’d seeing all John Travolta films from then on.
Soundtrack avialble at CD Universe for $16.15
http://www.cduniverse.com/search/xx/music/pid/6789860/a/Very+Merry+Unauthorized+Children's+Scientology+Pageant.htm
The perfect Festivus gift!
Shaze: BFE was a horrible movie, but the book was great.
The movie sucked, because they cut out 80% of the books plot, and rewrote what was left. and the psychlos should have been like 9 feet tall and sort of like skinless humaniods, not like klingon wannabees.
In other words, it was Hollywooded.
L. Ron hubbard may have been an idiot schizo, but he did write great speculative fiction.
And Mission Earth is one of the funniest satirical pieces of fiction I have ever read, on par with Gulliver’s travels.
Just for the record, I am not a scientologist.
NOOOOOOOOOOO! Gasmonso, I hate you for getting this stuck in my head! ;)
ACK! ARGH! Oy!!!
Soon I will have you all under my spell!!! Muahahahahaha!!!
Long live Scientology!!!
gasmonso
I have to agree, the movie was horrid, but the book was great. Based on a comment above, I guess L. Ron Hubbard is dead (too lazy and uninterested to bother looking it up) and probably died long before that movie came to light. I highly doubt he would have been at all happy with what they did to his great book.
I also liked the book Battle Field Earth. Hated the Movie. I tried to read some of his other stuff and just found it strange and nowhere near as good as BFE (the book).
Scientology on the otherhand has risen to a new level of strange. A holy pedastal of WTF are you guys on. As I walk down the street I can’t help thinking which of these normal looking average outwouldly level headed people have belief in scientology hidden in their head.
Now I hate knocking peoples beliefs but I must admit to finding it difficult to image how someone could possibly come to the logical conculsion, given or the evidence, that this load of insanity is likely to be in the ball park of the truth.
what the hell is scientology? No one tries to explain.
Sounds to me like all the other crap of human beings preying on other human beings. Religion in its purest sense. I’m glad I’m not gullible. I feel sorry for all the
poor sods who are.
Here you go, eccles: http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/story/9363363/inside_scientology
Alternatively, watch Southpark epsidoe 912, Trapped in the Closet.
It’s much more amusing ;)
wasted time and southpark, why would you want to watch this?
Aw, this was a really nice post. In idea I wish to put in writing like this additionally – taking time and precise effort to make a very good article… but what can I say… I procrastinate alot and in no way seem to get one thing done.