In a stunning reversal of character, God has changed his mind! At least according to the Catholic Church. Before this historic alteration of centuries of theology, unbaptized babies were still tainted with Original Sin and where thus unworthy to be in the presence of God. God, not being heartless enough to send those innocent dead babies to Hell, made a special place just for them: Limbo!
Not anymore! In a document released by the Catholic News Service and approved by the Pope himself, there is no limbo anymore. According to the document, “People find it increasingly difficult to accept that God is just and merciful if he excludes infants, who have no personal sins, from eternal happiness, whether they are Christian or non-Christian.” Apparently, the actions of God are subject to public approval.
A change this large hasn’t occurred since the sun suddenly stopped circling the earth and the earth started spinning instead. As usual, God was unavailable for comment.