Missing Persons

Crayola Unveils New Jesus-Colored Crayon!

Crayola is known for their ridiculous names when it comes to colors. There’s Razzmatazz, Fuzzy Wuzzy Brown, and Jazzberry Jam just to name a few. As a matter of fact there are 133 colors and a variety of specialty ones from swirls to scents. But Crayola may have outdone themselves this time with the new Jesus-colored crayon! [...]

Vatican Embarrassed By Virgin Mary?

Over the years there has been no shortage of religious people with overactive imaginations. They’ve seen Mary in the icebox, on grilled cheese sandwiches, in a bag of Funyuns, and even on a greasy pizza pan. The list unfortunately goes on. What’s fascinating is the amount of press that these stories have received. For instance, [...]

Religious Freaks Distraught Over Miracle Pizza Pan

Judah sent me this story a week ago and I reluctantly passed on it. But as fate would have it, the story has blossomed in to a full-fledged freak festival. As a result, it is my duty to report it now. On Ash Wednesday last month it seemed as if a miracle had taken place [...]

Crucified Jesus Makes Appearance In Texas!

The latest stop on the Jesus tour takes us to the small town of Crystal City Texas. They say everything is bigger in Texas and this latest Jesus visual association is no exception. Crystal City is a unique town. Popeye currently resides here and during WWII many Japanese aliens were forced to live there as [...]

Faithful Idiots Worship Virgin “Stalagmite” Mary

Thrifty Foods in Morton, Texas is host to the latest Virgin Mary sighting. She really outdid herself this time though when she harnessed the power of ice in a freezer to make herself visible. It's not apparent how long Mary has been in the Thrifty Foods, but employee Alma Avalos claims to have discovered her. [...]

Charles Darwin One-Ups Jesus

Charles Darwin, in an daring raid on creationism, shows that he too has the right stuff. While Darwin doesn’t make many appearances (none that I am aware of), he picked his time wisely and showed up on a tree after Jesus mistakenly appeared on the backend of a dog named Angus. I for one am [...]

Get Behind Jesus!

Oh praise be to the Lord Jesus Christ for he has graced us with his presence yet again. The Son of God has been on hiatus for quite some time, but he’s back… err on the back… of a dog… named Angus. But a miracle it is nonetheless. Hallelujah!!!!! Click the picture to see original [...]

Jesus Makes Surprise Appearance In Columbia

Jesus rises from the dead over Easter weekend in Chiquinquira, Columbia and scares the crap out of everyone. Late one evening, Jesus appeared on the wall of Lucila Cancelado’s home. A startled Lucila was quickly calmed when she realized it was just Jesus… or was it? To verify that this was indeed Jesus. To prove without a [...]

Mary Wanted For Arson In Mexico

Have You Seen This Boy?

"Police in South Florida are investigating a possible hate crime after a "baby Jesus" was stolen from a Nativity scene and other figurines were rearranged to make it look like one of the Three Wise Men was worshipping a sheep." While I understand that stealing Jesus (sounds funny saying that) is pretty stupid and quite [...]